We Hope They Weren’t Transferred to a Plainclothes Division

Daily Best of the Web   —   Posted on December 20, 2013

The following is an excerpt from OpinionJournal.com’s “Best of the Web” written by the editor, James Taranto.

NOTE: Mr. Taranto is on vacation until January 3rd.  In the meantime, enjoy excerpts from previous posts:

News of the Tautological

  • “Canceled Game Won’t be Resumed”–headline, ESPN.com, Nov. 28
  • “Fire Marshal: Church Was Torched by Arsonist”–headline, WCVB-TV website (Boston), Nov. 30

You’d Think That Would Cheer Him Up
“Cross Man Wins $100k From Scratch-Off Lottery Ticket”–headline, WCSC-TV website (Charleston, S.C.), July 16

It’s Always in the Last Place You Look
“Rare Book Found in Library”–headline, News-Leader (Springfield, Mo.), May 8

News of the Tautological

  • “An inmate serving a life sentence for murder has died in prison.”–STV website (Scotland), Nov. 12
  • “Authorities Search for Missing Man”–headline, Soo Evening News (Sault Ste. Marie, Mich.), Nov. 13

image1225We Hope They Weren’t Transferred to a Plainclothes Division 
“Transferred Minneapolis Cops Lose Suit”–headline, Star Tribune, Nov. 30

Other Than That, the Story Was Accurate
“A film review on Friday about the documentary ‘Drivers Wanted’ incorrectly rendered part of the director’s name. He is Joshua Z Weinstein, not Joshua Z. Weinstein.”–New York Times, Dec. 1

Other Than That, the Story Was Accurate 
“An earlier version of this article misidentified one of the animals that escaped on Staten Island. It was Casper the pony, not Casper the donkey.”–New York Times website, Nov. 28

And Boy Are Their Arms Tired 
“Democrats Still Hold Most Alabama Courthouse Offices”–headline, Associated Press, Nov. 12

Other Than That, the Story Was Accurate 
“An earlier version of this article misstated the International Energy Agency’s prediction of American self-sufficiency in energy production. The agency said 55 percent of the improvement would come from more oil production and 45 percent from improvements in energy efficiency. It did not say that domestic oil production would rise 55 percent. Also, an earlier version of a photo caption with this article misidentified the equipment shown in use in an oil field in Greensburg, Kan. It is a pump jack, not an oil rig.”–New York Times, Nov. 12

Stores Not to Rob 
If you’re bad at math, the New York Times has more to offer than just former Enron adviser Paul Krugman. Here’s a news story on the lottery:

One of the three winning tickets from the $656 million Mega Millions prize was sold at the MotoMart convenience store in Red Bud, Ill., about an hour southeast of St. Louis. The electronic marquee outside on Wednesday read “Lightning can strike twice!” which is inarguable. Enough people believed it could strike twice at this MotoMart that the store doubled the number of working staff members to accommodate the rush.

“It’s constant traffic,” said Denise Metzger, the manager. She declined to release her sales numbers because they were so high she feared she would be robbed.

And if you’re a robber, don’t bother with the MotoMart. Their sales numbers are a closely held secret.

[Excerpted from Daily BOTW posts at StudentNewsDaily on: Dec. 3, Dec. 4, Nov. 30, Nov. 14 and Sept. 4]

For more “Best of the Web” click here and look for the “Best of the Web Today” link in the middle column below “Today’s Columnists.”