The following is an excerpt from OpinionJournal.com’s “Best of the Web” written by the editor, James Taranto.

They Need Voice Mail
“Referees Missing Important Calls Left and Right”–headline, New York Post, April 19

Questions Nobody Is Asking
“Do Protests in Nigeria, Uganda, and Burkina Faso Have Anything in Common?”–headline, Christian Science Monitor, April 19

News of the Tautological
“Patients With ‘Do Not Resuscitate’ Orders More Likely to Die Following Surgery”–headline, Hartford Courant, April 18

Save Dunder Mifflin!
If you thought Jesse Jackson was a dinosaur, wait till you get a load of his son. Rep. Jesse Jackson Jr., an Illinois Democrat, gave a speech on the House floor Friday in which he blamed the iPad for unemployment, the Chicago Tribune reports:

“Now Borders is closing stores because why do you need to go to Borders anymore? Why do you need to go to Barnes & Noble?” Jackson said. “Buy an iPad and download your newspaper, download your book, download your magazine.” Borders filed for bankruptcy protection in February.

The Democratic congressman went on to cite the iPads given to students at universities such as Chicago State, in Jackson’s district, and questioned what the decline in the use of textbooks would do to other industries.

“What becomes of publishing companies and publishing company jobs? What becomes of bookstores and librarians and all of the jobs associated with paper?”

On the other hand, in the olden days you couldn’t buy buggy whips online.

For more “Best of the Web” click here and look for thef “Best of the Web Today” link in the middle column below “Today’s Columnists.”