Bottom Stories of the Day

Daily Best of the Web   —   Posted on April 18, 2014

The following is an excerpt from’s “Best of the Web” written by the editor, James Taranto.


Russian President Vladimir Putin

  • “Kim Kardashian Falls Off Her Bike”–headline, USA Today, April 16
  • “75 Years After Its Birth, TV Is More Popular Than Ever”–headline, Province (Vancouver, British Columbia), April 17
  • “Putin Does Not Rule Out Sending Russian Troops Into Ukraine”–headline, Chicago Tribune, April 17

Try Not to Think of an Elephant Groping You 
The Transportation Security Administration has a program called TSA Precheck. For an $85 fee, those who pass a background check get faster security lines and exemption from some of the tiresome rules, such as doffing shoes and removing laptops from bags. But The Wall Street Journal reports the TSA is having trouble marketing the program. This quote from the delightfully named TSA chief, John Pistole, helps illustrate why:

“I want passengers, when they think of TSA, to think of something positive instead of patting down 95-year-old grannies or taking teddy bears away from children,” said Mr. Pistole.

We hadn’t thought about old ladies getting patted down or kids having their toys confiscated in ages–until Pistole reminded us of them.

For more “Best of the Web” click here and look for the “Best of the Web Today” link in the middle column below “Today’s Columnists.”